Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 02, 2011

How To Walk In A Fallen World!!!


How To Walk In A Fallen World!!! - Walk out and/or keep your healing!


We are ALL walking out SANTIFICATION until Christ comes for His bride!

My Process to Healing! I had to learn that Disease comes when we are separated from God, from ourselves, and from others. My healing started when I reconciled with God and received His love, reconciling with Him as my Father and making peace with Him. I also had to reconcile with myself and with others to complete the healing process, forgive my debts, and love who I truly am! Plus, continually forgive when others hurt you again!

The heart is made to love, nothing else. When we forgive, we are loving. Love is forgiveness. Jesus showed us the ultimate love of dying on the cross for us, and did it to bring us forgiveness. The first part of Matthew 22:38-40 was described when I spoke of Love of God. As we read on in Matthew 22:38-40, it says, "..and the second one is like unto it, we are to love others as we love ourselves."
Simply put, as we get to "know" God and how much He loves us and is able to receive that love for us personally, we are to do the same with others and not believe the lies we believe! Those lies also separate us from God's love. I know I believed some of those lies, which separated me.

Receive God's love more and more, and the hidden impurities surfaced. My sins were, and still are, being exposed so I can confess them. When I confessed them, God purged me and it brought me even closer to Him. That's the good news!

We get stuck on loving ourselves! We don't even want to make friends because we know ourselves all too well, all the hidden junk, all the past mistakes, etc., for fear they'll find all this stuff out. The truth is, God, already knows it anyway.

We get mad at ourselves when we make a mistake (sin). I know I did. I used to beat myself up literally. I was a rage alcoholic against myself. We think we must "pay" for them somehow, stay miserable for a few days, etc. But, if we truly believe in forgiveness, we would take it the minute we sinned, thereby staying free FROM sin, as Jesus promised. It's not that there won't be sin any longer; it's that we don't take it when it comes!

The Sanctification Process - don't be tricked by the enemy:

* To come clean or identify unforgiveness, if you have not done this already, list when you got hurt, experienced trauma or rejection, and see if a person, God, or self is attached to that event you need to forgive. Go back to your earliest memory and work forward. Did you know unforgiveness binds you to that person and also binds you to emotional pain? Every emotional pain in your life is a result of unforgiveness. When you can genuinely forgive a person, your heart will healed -- no more pain around that memory. Forgiveness of sins and healing diseases work together! Are you a stuffer - stuffing your emotions? Many people suppress their feelings and don't deal with their pain. A stuffer denies specific strong needs and represses a lot of feelings – shut down. Eventually, what they stuffed comes out in sickness, disease, or mental torment. Learn when someone hurts you to not stuff it or go in denial. Recognize your hurt and ask God to help you forgive instead of stuffing. "Stuffing is bad to your health." Do you replay past events in your head or tell the same story over and over what someone else, church, or job did to you, and you cannot stop thinking or stop talking about it? Guess what! That is Unforgiveness! Pay attention to what you are thinking or talking about!

* Then 1 John 1:9 - confess these sins to God, and then RECEIVE forgiveness. Simply confessing is good, but it's complete when we RECEIVE forgiveness. If you have a hard time receiving, that's OK, it will come as you continue your love quest with God.


* Do you have expectations of others to meet your needs as a parent would? Are you still performing? Are you hoping they will say words that you NEED? Are you in a cycle of being abused, expecting things to be different? REMEMBER: Doing the same thing but expecting different results is the definition of INSANITY. Are you disappointed, hurt, and crushed every time it does not happen AGAIN? Guess what, they won't, and it won't change. Satan is setting you up for disappointments heaped with more hurt and pain. Let go of the expectations of others.

EXPECTATIONS are really judgment/bitterness. Only the Lord can meet your needs. When we expect someone to act like a parent or special someone, we make them an idol. My healing came faster when I released the people I had expectations of. I was flooded with freedom from my heart. Plus, they changed!

* Hurting people hurts people. We live in a world full of hurting people. Expect to get hurt by others but not broken. How do I stay intact? The faster you separate them (Romans 7 Separation Teaching - it's not them but the sin in them), forgive them (a friend told me, "forgive before the crow gets cold"), then you won't be broken.


Jeremiah 5:25 says that we withhold good things from us. When we don't forgive, we block all blessings! Isaiah 59:1-2 says, God can heal us, but our sins and iniquities prevent Him. He cannot move against our will. Our sins and iniquities are unforgiveness and not receiving God's love.

* Are you being driven to meet everyone else's expectations? - "Fear of man", "fear of rejection", fear of failure", fear of abandonment", etc. Stop if you are! God leads, and satan drives. If satan is driving you, then get out of the driver's seat and allow the Lord to lead you. Being led is much more peaceful than being driven by fear.

"1 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. 2 Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ. 3 For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself. 4 But let every man prove his own work, and then shall he have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another. 5 For every man shall bear his own burden."

* Do you get all caught up helping others (advising others when they didn't ask) and not taking care of self? False Burden Bearing is rooted in rejection! The enemy is tricky and will use your feelings of rejection to try to get you to help others (to steal your peace) so that you will feel accepted, but in reality, satan is stealing your peace and keeping you in "turmoil." It is meeting a need in you to help others. Let go and let God! Let Him be in control! Yes, pray for them, but release them to the Lord standing in faith, saying, "It is done." This is activating your faith by standing!

You do want to come alongside them! We are to support them during their trials. You are not there to solve their solutions. You want to avoid becoming consumed with their thoughts about the situation and person (children, parents, or someone they care about).

* Watch your thought life and don’t dwell in the negative. Keep our thoughts captive under truth, casting down all imaginations that exalt themselves against the knowledge of God. (II Corinthians 10:5).

If you believe the negative lies of Satan or others, it can cause you to pursue perfection, performance, drive, pull away, and engage in self-comparison, ultimately causing you to lose your peace and separate you from the Love of the Lord! Resist him because thoughts can lead to sin! "Submit yourselves to God, resist the Devil, and He will flee." This means submitting your mind, body, and soul to the Lord.

* Know God's Love Is Unconditional! There is nothing you can do to receive more of His LOVE, and there is no sin so large to lose His LOVE. The only difference between the lost and the saved is we have the promises. He loves the lost just as much as the saved. Sin separates us, but God is always there with His arms wide open to receive you back through His mercy. You do not need to perform to receive more of His LOVE. It's already done! The Scripture clearly teaches that God's love (phileo, agape, aheb, ahabah, etc.) is unfailing, undeserved, and unilateral (completely one-sided in initiation). But is God's love without condition--I.E.: UN- conditional? Come into His Rest!!!

*
Watch what comes out of your mouth! Is It a Good Report or a Bad report?

(Philippians 4:8) "Finally brethren, Whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, if there be any praise, think on these things. AND those things which ye have both learned, received, heard, and seen in me, do, and the God of peace shall be with you."

When you have symptoms, don't receive them or become one with them.

Conclusion:

Don't be tricked by the enemy, but be wise (Hebrews 5:14) and discern good and evil. Recognize the accuser, cast those thoughts down, and don't receive them, even if they come from a person. Know who you are to the Lord. You are precious in His sight!

I leave you with this scripture: 1 Thessalonians 5:23 "And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly; and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ."

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Symptoms of Unforgiveness

What is Bitterness?

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Bitterness is a chronic state of smoldering resentment, is one of the most destructive and toxic human emotions, and when a person is bitter usually has hostility toward someone who hurt them.  If not taken care of the bitterness, will be very judgmental, cruel, hurtful to others, murmur and complain about others very easily, and has no grace.  Resentment can turn into retaliation towards another person up to murder physically or with the tongue - gossip or evil talk tearing down someone's character. 

Many times people, who refuse to forgive others, live as victims - with a spirit of self-pity telling others what someone did to them.  If bitterness is not taken care of will manifest as long-term mismanagement of annoyance, irritation, frustration, anger, or rage.  Most mental disorders stem either directly from--or secondarily generate--anger, rage, resentment, hostility, or bitterness.

Most mental illnesses will manifest either:  self-defeating - depression or sometimes passive-aggressive, destructive, vengeful, or even violent behavior. Pathological embitterment is a dangerous state of mind that can and does motivate evil deeds toward others. 

Dwelling on Negative Events

One of the most reliable means of detecting unforgiveness is when a person dwells on negative events; both past and present. Unforgiving persons will replay the negative events over and over in their minds and refuse to submit them to the Lord per His command. Sometimes the unforgiving person will tell other people about these events, and sometimes they will not. Some refuse to say anything, and some cannot stop talking about it. I believe it is good to talk over things for the sake of counseling. However, I believe it is bad for them to be discussed frequently in ordinary conversations since then; it is nothing more than gossip.

Mental torment or mental illness is linked to unforgiveness.

Negative Images
You will have negative images of the person that hurt you, and these images will keep you awake at night!

You Will Be Pinged!
If the person that hurt you enters the room or someone mentions their name, you feel feelings of being pinged, your heart hurts like a broken heart, you get angry, you want to run or hide when they enter the room, start telling someone what they did to you - going into an accusation or gossip about that person or you just do not want to hear that name, then you have unforgiveness.

Bitterness
Unforgiving persons are often bitter persons. Family relationships seem to be the hardest for them to cope with. Friends not connected to the family, oddly enough, seem to escape the wrath of the unforgiving person, whereas family members must endure the scowls, silent treatments, insults, thrown objects, and yelling. Unforgiving persons, who happen to attend church, treat some church members as badly as they would their immediate family. This is the reason some unforgiving persons refuse to attend church at all.

Depression
A relationship not right with God is depressing. We cannot expect to be blessed when we are out from under God's hands of protection due to our refusal to forgive someone else. Unforgiving persons cannot have a right relationship with the Lord until they repent and forgive. Therefore, many of God's blessings are not given to them, and protection against the devil is no longer guaranteed to the unforgiving person.

Distrust in People - Paranoia
When you've been hurt or not cared for by a parent(s), then usually there is bitterness.  The bitterness will manifest as distrust and suspicion of others.  I knew of a woman she has a ministry who was paranoid about everything.  She had a prophetic gift, but she many times would read people wrong because of that paranoia which is a spirit of fear pairing up with bitterness.  I would see her each month cutting off people either because she didn't trust them, they didn't do something right or she was just jealous of them because of the similarity of gifts. 

Very Critical and Religious


Self-Harm
Every cutter and burner I have met admitted to me that they refuse to forgive someone. Some have told me they use self-injury as a coping mechanism. I do not fully understand this and wonder if I ever will. Even though I may not understand, I have come to recognize this as a sign of unforgiveness, and I then investigate who it was that originally hurt them and when.

Self-Seclusion
Eventually, the unforgiving person tends to withdraw from having contact with other human beings. There comes a time when it's simply too much to deal with. The unforgiving person can reach a point where they will not risk being hurt by anyone else ever again. The issues build up unless something is released. I've noticed that some who seclude themselves engage in "throw-away" relationships via the Internet. This way, as soon as some new Internet friend hurts their feelings, they can send an exhaustive email explaining how they felt the other person hurt them and then block their ex-friends' emails or instant messages.

Inability to Recognize God's Presence
Satan can use unforgiveness to form a barrier between the person and the Lord. How can this be? It's simple. God cannot forgive those who refuse to forgive someone else. Unforgiven sin separates us from God. It must be the willful volition of the unforgiving person to forgive. It must become their desire to submit their life to God's Will and love Him more so than obtaining revenge or any other form of compensation. I advise people to report the crimes against them so that the matter of justice leaves their hands and is transferred to law enforcement and the judicial system, and ultimately to God. God is just and holy. He punishes sin. If the person refuses to hand the matter over to the authorities, they must forgive nonetheless. Nobody is exempt from God's command to forgive, no matter the circumstances. The difference is that justice no longer becomes a personal thing but rather something belonging to God. Instead of wanting justice our way, we should trust God's power and perfect planning to deal with the matter justly, His Way. This literally frees us to think about other things, such as God's love, grace, mercy, and His forgiveness of our own personal sins we committed against Him.

Attention Seeking
Some people use past and present unforgiven events to obtain the attention of other people. Have you ever heard the old saying, "It's the squeaky wheel that gets the grease"? Some people have learned that this is true. They squeak! For some reason, and I do not understand why this is either, some unforgiving persons refuse to forgive because they can still use whatever the offense was to obtain the sympathy and attention they crave. To forgive would be to let go of their victim status. Some might fear that nobody will listen to them anymore. When we forgive people because we have chosen to follow Jesus, we are not victims anymore, but rather we are made more than conquerors in Christ. Attention must be shifted from what happened and then be given to God in submission to His Divine Will for our lives. Pride must be done away with so that the unforgiving person will humbly admit they are sinful, too. I believe God's heart is broken whenever someone is abused, but I also believe that His heart is broken all the more whenever we reject what His Son, Jesus Christ, did on the cross to purchase our forgiveness.



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